As a runner I have plenty of times where I just do not have the energy. However, I go anyway and my day is better because of it. Then there are days where every step I take is like running through sandy water. My legs just won't work right. But I push through.
Pushing through isn't easy either. Not in running, not in anything. That's why its called 'pushing through' because it requires a different set of skills than normal.
This is what change feels like. It offers resistance every step of the way; each step you take is gruelling, nauseating, and harder than the last. When its over though, when you ran those laps that you almost quit, when your exhausted and glad its over...that's when you realize that you have just grown. Change has occurred.
It doesn't matter if the change you seek is drug addiction, social network adjustments (dropping a negative influence or picking a few support persons to lean on), leaving an abusive relationship, finally loving yourself...the list goes on and on...change is hard. We are creatures that revolve around habits. The sun comes up every day, the sun goes down every day. You depend on that, we all do.
Know this, people struggle and face hardships. Sometimes its a disability, or a crappy childhood (and by crappy I mean downright vicious), or maybe you have terrible luck and the only God you have ever tried to lean on just won't answer...honey, we all feel that way. Your unique but you ain't so special that the wheel goes easier for you.
Every step may suck, but change is necessary, you'll be glad you did it...promise.
With Love
Jeff Utnage
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