Trying to go back in the closet was what I had in mind originally when I came to this new place. Nobody knew me and it would have been a great thing to just stay low key and out of the way. Especially given what just occurred.
But it appears that a higher power had other plans and before I knew it I was seeking my peers. Trans inmates have a soft place in my heart because they are at such high risks for exploitation and misuse of their bodies. I just want to love them. Truthfully, I crave love in return as well. As brothers and sisters, of course.
I think that it's interesting that my plan went awry, however, I am glad that it did. I was miserable being in the closet for 28 years and it felt that I was letting myself down by going back in. Forget that...not happening.
Going back is never a good idea in life. Don't back step, always forward progress my loves. Even when it appears as though you are in a corner, stay true to you and don't hide from anything, least of all yourself.
If you ever need help with a seemingly impossible situation, find a friend or three and hit us up. I will be here because I hated nobody being there for me.
With Love, Your Friend
Jeff Utnage
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