I used to teach a program called Redemption: Self Awareness. One week, each cohort, we had a whole session dedicated to revealing one element that most people wouldn't know about you. Each person would begin by saying "If you really knew me you would know..."
When I took the class initially I was the only LGBT person in there. I was out and proud about it but I also have a sex offense, which gives me a real stigma. So I answered the statement by saying "If you really knew me than you would know I am gay and there is nothing I can do about it. I cannot change my past but if I could, I would. I know that nearly everyone in this room hates me, I can feel it. If you really knew me you would know that if I could be different, straight, I would be, it would be one less mark against me so I could make a friend or two."
That moment was powerful for me because I was able to take control of my emotions and flesh out preconceived ideas. I realized I could be vulnerable and tell people precisely what I am thinking and how I feel because if you don't they will develop their own versions.
Since that class I have cleaned out my secrets, my hidden realities and dealt with them head on. This is a major part of why I was able to embrace my womanhood after 36 years, I was finally stable enough to appropriately cope with such a monumental change. I am miles away from the selfish person I once was.
Here is something I would like to challenge you with, do your own "If you really knew me..." with a few of your loved ones. Maybe you could even do it with coworkers or stand in the mirror and do it. But I challenge you to let just one hidden piece about you out. It doesn't have to be bad, it can be good, a fun secret like you're a closet quilter or something.
It feels good to stand face to face with someone and have them know who you truly are.
Subscribe, Follow, Interact, Comment and change YOUR community
With Love
Jeff aka Ruthie Utnage
www.lgbtqprisonsupport.com
When I took the class initially I was the only LGBT person in there. I was out and proud about it but I also have a sex offense, which gives me a real stigma. So I answered the statement by saying "If you really knew me than you would know I am gay and there is nothing I can do about it. I cannot change my past but if I could, I would. I know that nearly everyone in this room hates me, I can feel it. If you really knew me you would know that if I could be different, straight, I would be, it would be one less mark against me so I could make a friend or two."
That moment was powerful for me because I was able to take control of my emotions and flesh out preconceived ideas. I realized I could be vulnerable and tell people precisely what I am thinking and how I feel because if you don't they will develop their own versions.
Since that class I have cleaned out my secrets, my hidden realities and dealt with them head on. This is a major part of why I was able to embrace my womanhood after 36 years, I was finally stable enough to appropriately cope with such a monumental change. I am miles away from the selfish person I once was.
Here is something I would like to challenge you with, do your own "If you really knew me..." with a few of your loved ones. Maybe you could even do it with coworkers or stand in the mirror and do it. But I challenge you to let just one hidden piece about you out. It doesn't have to be bad, it can be good, a fun secret like you're a closet quilter or something.
It feels good to stand face to face with someone and have them know who you truly are.
Subscribe, Follow, Interact, Comment and change YOUR community
With Love
Jeff aka Ruthie Utnage
www.lgbtqprisonsupport.com
No comments:
Post a Comment