Wednesday, July 6, 2016

Post LGBTI Event Feelings: What A Let Down

I knew that some guys would have a problem with a gay oriented event. Refusing to accept it in any way. Holding on to some Puritanical beliefs they have never had to fully adhere to.
But some guys here have gone on fasts and prayer missions vowing to keep in prayer to combat the congregating queers. Angry at God and the system for allowing a Pride event to happen.
I suppose that the same kind of heel dragging and whining happened in the Civil Rights movement of the 60's for African Americans. Probably for women too when they had the audacity to demand equal pay and treatment or God forbid the right to vote. 
I have to say that the event when down in our own personal history books as something that was ground breaking. But that high is followed closely by the reality of bigotry rearing its ugly head up. Something that really bothers me is the fact that I am a Christian. I love God and some of His people love me too. They are precious to me. But the majority has waged war on us. In their mind this is an us VS them war. Which is sad. I don't mean just in prison, I am talking globally. My fellow Christian brothers and sisters are sick with seeds of hate and now my family has become my enemy and I hate it. I love them, though they don't love me. What are we as a culture suppose to do?
We look to our predecessors. We do what produced a positive result and mimick it. What did they do? They marched on. They kept fighting.
This event caused me to lose some friends. They have deemed me the enemy, choosing to follow a seemingly sinful choice rather then their righteous path. But in losing those 10 or 15 I gained another 55 at the event. So I look at it ( in the words of my friend in here) as I just had a friend swap meet where I got the better deal. 
I did want to toot my own peoples horn a little though, at this years Christian event, which was an Easter celebration, there were sexual deeds done that resulted in several "Christians" being quietly escorted out for sexual misconduct. At the gay event with all of us uncontrollable sex mongers, not a single incident. Which is more then I can say for my Christian family's event. Not throwing mud or nothing, just saying. Were supposed to be the heathens who have no decency yet we controlled ourselves. OK, I'm done throwing arrows. LOL!
Keeping my mind on track here, these kind of weeks produce strength and solidarity. This is just another reminder that yes we are making advancements, but a breeding ground is still untouched and I'm fighting it without the masses. Prison is still one of the last places in the country that still promotes and nurtures the bigoted mindset. Where LGBTI people and those with sex related crimes are targeted by murderers and robbers to satisfy there own need to feel superior. In most places staff does not intervene but here, at Stafford Creek, one small step was made that seemed no big deal to most out there, but in here it was our own Stonewall, our own refusal to switch seats on the bus. 

If I fight in here and keep heart when the ride is over, so can you. Keep your faith in God, love one another and depend on no one to lend a hand when you most need it. You and you alone must fight your battles and it begins inside your mind, and its won inside your mind. 

With Love
Jeff Utnage

No comments: