4-21-2016

A Little More Reserved:

Have you ever thought that maybe your a little too "out"? I couldn't be convinced that there was such a thing until recently. I am a facilitator of a class and I had a book out while taking attendance "The Danish Girl" (OM freaking goodness what great book!!) and a guy came in and said he wanted it. I laughed and said "this book?" in a half-hearted tone. and then went on to say "there's a long line player" just jokingly becuase I figured he was just making fun of me. But then he said "well, their asking, im telling you, that book is mine"

It wasn't about the book at all. It was this weird dominance thing he had going on. I recognized the tactic from some inmates doing it to female staff and then snickering about it later. They will do something like that and intimidate them a little. Get them a little weirded out, then they think that they have some sort of power over them...very strange stuff. Anyway, he did that to me today and I didn't apreciate it very much. I obviously talked to my peers afterwards about it and then brought it up in a meeting with everyone. Collectively we came up with a plan to keep my safe and two, make sure that he has a fair chance at changing. Hopefully, I am confident, that both will happen. 
I find it interesting though that for the first time I regretted coming out to a large group of people. Perhaps I should think about being a little more reserved in certain situations??

I in NO WAY feel like I am in ANY kind of danger. I am very safe right now..I just know that perhaps its time to be a little more reserved in some spaces? LOL! But then again, maybe not!

With Love

Jeff Utnage