4-4-2016

Just keep Swimming
Remember the movie Finding Nemo? Dorie the fish sang a little song *just keep swimming, just keep swimming * it was a simple way to cope with a seemingly endless journey. This is also true for us in the LGBTQ community. It seems it may be impossible to get the expected outcome we dream about. This *outcome * is different for everyone.
For me the expected outcome is a place I can sort out my emotional baggage as it relates to my sexual identity. In addition, this would also be a place where others can do the same. This is the short term goal. The long term is that homosexuality will not be illegal in DOC. That's another post though.
This road is long and will wear you down. Like believing in God, you will doubt. You will question your motives and logic and everyone who attempts to help. We see where were at and where we want to be and get hopeless and discouraged. But keep going, keep pressing onward. 
Those that want us to feel less then will make our goal hard to achieve. They will plant seeds of doubt. We can not allow that line of thought to dictate our actions. I don't have everything all figured out, but I know this: quitting is not an option. I need social, emotional and moral support. 
Waiting until your stable financially or you have everything under control is not going to get the ball rolling. You will never know what you need to be prepared for the battle ahead until you start fighting it. It seems that most often our biggest obstacle is ourselves. Our fear of failure, our fear of judgement or some other fear. 
Don't be afraid, be willing. You may not be perfect, but your perfect for your cause. Looking foolish only happens when you quit, you don't look dumb for trying, only when you give up or don't try at all. Putting yourself out there will put you out of your comfort zone and that is exactly what needs to happen to experience growth. To move beyond where you are, you must first move.

With Love

Jeff Utnage 823469
H3-B-120-U
Stafford Creek Correction Center
191 Constantine Way
Aberdeen, WA. 98520

Feel free to write!